The devil is beating his wife

For as long as I can remember every time it would rain and the sun would shine my mom would say, "the devil is beating his wife". So what does it mean when it is snowing and the sun is shining??? Today M and I went on a little adventure while N was enjoying his last day of school, and on that adventure we drove through snow! While most of the time I would be enthusiastic about snow, not today... I feel like it is a never ending winter and that makes spring and J's homecoming seem forever away! I am just ready for the warmer weather and seeing the snow didn't make me very happy! March is just around the corner and in my mind we should be enjoying 60 degree weather. Thinking about March makes me think about our anniversary and I am sad that another one is here and he is not going to be! It also makes me appreciate every day we have together and apart, as long as he is okay it doesn't seem like such a big deal... as long as he is okay! We have spent much of our 10 years together in some sort of long distance relationship, and I remember at 18 how it seemed like the end of the world that he was going away, I loved him so much!!! Now if it possible I love him so much more and when he loaded that bus he took my heart with him. I know this sounds very dramatic but it is the truth and I dont know any other way to describe it! He is my world and while it is not ending anymore... I still feel like that 18 year old who isn't quite sure what to do with herself! My light in all of this are the two beautiful children we have been blessed with and while it is not their responsibility they are wonderful at it!!! So maybe when it rains/snows and the sun shines the devil isnt beating his wife but its God telling us to stay positive and see the light through all the clouds!

boomin

Woke up to "boomin" this morning and I must say it is a wonderful way to wake up! N ran in and said, "Mommy, can you hear the boomin too" and of coarse I could but I love how sweet he is! The truth is, it makes me miss J so much when I hear artillery, I mean I miss him more than anything always but when they shoot it just throws it in my face!! We are definitely half way through this deployment but man I can not wait to be all the way done!! I am ready for him to meet his daughter and to play with N, who by the way walks around the house saying "I love my daddy"... break my heart!!! It is so different than the last deployment when he didnt really know what was going on, now he knows and wants Josh home as much as I do!!! The other night at dinner he said "wait mommy something's missing" (of coarse I thought I forgot his ketchup or something) I asked him what was it and he said "Daddy"! So I know he feels it and I am trying to be sympathetic to that... hopefully he wont remember this time in his future or if he does he will remember the good, calm times when mommy was not acting like a complete looney tune!!!

Trying something new

Today I decided to start a blog, I am very nervous about this because I can never seem to say the right thing or get my thoughts down exactly the way I want! I know it is a little late into this deployment to start something for J to follow, but I guess it is better late than never. I also think that it will help our family's with the distance created by our life in the military, I know it is not the same but it is a way for them to follow our day to day experiences!

So, yesterday I went to the eye doctor and he had the personality of a fish and he mumbled. He sat at the computer trying to chart and just kept shaking his head in disgust... it was a very interesting experience. Anyway, it turns out that I need some help to see far away and I decided that maybe I would like to try contacts, WHAT WAS I THINKING!!! This is the hardest and most uncomfortable thing I have ever tried to do, sticking my finger in my eye... YUCK!!! It is great to be able to see the street signs, but it feels soooo weird! So I am not sure how or if I am ever going to get used to it, but it is always good to try something new!